Don’t embrace questionability of yourself

mental respect for self-worth is essential for success

Can something that seemed almost at reach slip at the last moment, was that slip caused by personal fault or by an unknown cause that still eludes your minds grasp.  You always thought you were on the right path, doing the right thing, going in the right direction.  Gave up so much for this one thing, where in the end it didn’t pan out the way you thought it would.

So many sacrifices, so many more things added to the plethora of “to-does”, running here and there, working your tail off; all of these decisional actions can land you in a place where you thought you’d never end up.

Did I meet up to the standard, did I fall short, am I impressive to the outside world, am I accomplished….

Everyday, people, whether business men or women, students, homemakers, kids, or adolescents all hit this seemingly unmanageable, insurmountable brick wall from time to time.  Questioning themselves; always taunted by the outside criticizing eyes of some element, within their world.

WHY? Why does everyone, at some point or another, question themselves?  When we doubt our own achievements and personal perceptions we are selling ourselves short.   You can’t, you’re not good enough, you just don’t measure up; just because one person out of the 7 billion people on earth repelled your self-righteousness doesn’t mean for you to follow suit.  It should mean for you to fight harder.  The worlds smartest or dumbest, friendliest or unkind, greedy or giving have an equal chance at getting where they want, it all depends on who will work the hardest to get there.

Every single person whether good, bad, happy, sad, humble, or conceited was put on this earth for a reason, and our journey throughout life is to find this reason.  Some find it early, some late, some never; don’t put yourself in the latter category, stop demeaning yourself; the quicker done the faster you will find your purpose.

I found my reason at an early age, my ability to withstand criticism and doubt and use them as fuel for my desire has lead me to where I am today.  I may not be the best, the smartest, or the highest qualified but I am that one person who can look at a negative situation and make it positive, put 3 hours in for everyone else’s one, have the determination and self focus to propel through the tough times, be the remembered person for my genuine kindness and respectability, and be the one that stands out, maybe not by being the best, but being the person who never gave up, never lost hope, and will never settle for anything less.

Hard work, self-belief, confidence, determination, and will power are the key elements that will always allow for success even in the most failing of situations.  These core qualities are entwined within my being, and although I may look regular or common on paper I am unique for my approach to life; I can be anything I want, if I want it bad enough.  For me, everything I work for gets 100%.  If I volunteer or choose to dedicate my time towards something, you better believe I give it my all, each and every time!!

Remember: people’s perception of you will never be as good as your own, if you don’t believe in yourself, how are other people supposed to? Go for your dreams, never fall short, and never give up; if one path forms a barrier, find an alternate route.

A Helping Hand For a Better Tomorrow

A little given help from one person has the power to change the world forever!

Have you ever been faced with a world-renowned problem, want to get involved, but always commandeer an excuse that resembles the notion: a mere set of hands cannot and will not make a difference?  Think of poverty, homelessness, education issues, abuse, and kidnapping; this list is forever growing and these catastrophes are constantly encroaching and smothering not only our country, but also our world.  The problem, is that people can only see and wrap their mind around this astronomical, universal ailment; not the small things that add up to the surplus of despair.

Some cannot understand how the seemingly tiniest volunteered action, can save the life of an individual.  Handing out water, donating time to help cook for the underprivileged, or to just have a 5 minute conversation can change someone’s life forever.  The tiniest shed of hope that protrudes from your soul can be the ropes that bring people to their feet, bring brightness to their darkened outlook, and give them a reason to continue their path forward.

Imagine a world where instead of the usual alarm clock, the commotion of traffic and disgruntled drivers announce the beginning to your day.  Those new shoes in your closet are replaced with rugged sandals, hiding beneath your bed of gathered leaves so a passerby will not steal your luxury.  That electric run fridge sitting on the glistening tile of your kitchen is replaced with a rusted, chained, tin-can holding the remains of peoples wastefulness on a cold and rough cement pavement. Smiling, friendly faces of new acquaintances along your journey to work are replaced with smirks, frowns, and constant derogatory verbal and physical actions always judging your state of being.

I used to be one of you, always aware of the significant issues that impact our world, but too small to help.  Until recently, today, I made my first committed step to help with our educational issues.  Today, I met a fourth grade young man, whose smile and ambiance lit the hallways of his failing, F rated school.  His apprehension of life is on point with kids of his age, but his educational knowledge somewhat behind.  His craving to be better in life explodes within ever syllable his mouth pronounces, and his personality is accepting towards any willing and helping hand.  Today I was that hand, the hand I hope will guide him and support him to become anything he desires.

Today I’ve done something most won’t do, I ignored that overused notion of our nation and I stepped up to the plate.  I may have not resolved the failing aspects of our educational systems, but I plan on resolving the issues of an individual within that failing system.  This one small action brought hope to a child in a bad situation, where this emotion will push him to better himself and overall better the school.

I challenge you to a leap of faith, faith in yourself that you are capable to change something for the good.  During your busy day accomplish one good deed, whether it be a smile to the man who sleeps by the nearby gas station, voluntarily asking your neighbor to pick up their child from school, or tossing a bagged lunch to the intersections needy.  Although you might not feel satisfied with the idea that you made a difference, but that hope and empty stomach you filled will not go unnoticed by the accepter.

Less of me, or the Less of me, Physically?

Food does not define life; the mind does!

Take-out, Fast food, overeating, and snacking; these few seemingly harmful habits can have drastic unequivocal repercussions within only a few months.  Skipping breakfast and eating a hefty late lunch, followed by a gorge at midnight seemed to epitomize my college life.  Surly lacking healthful nutritional aspects my unaware change of person grappled my knowing conscience.

I never, ever had a problem with being overweight, been there most of my life.  Never had any social problems throughout school or any other social activities; come to think of it, it was the complete opposite.  I loved going out, making new friends, and learning new things; never thought weight mattered, and to an extent it didn’t.  My personality allowed me to thrive socially and become a popular young adult; later allowing for the best friends and family to shape me into what I am today.

This past summer it hit me, I did not want to purposely stretch out my shirts before going out, neglect my favorite jeans because the “waistband shrunk”, and buy the top sizes at my favorite stores.  This past summer I made a change, working out replaced lounging around the house, grilled chicken and veggies replaced the number 5 on the menu, and clothing sizes of my youth replaced the table cloths of the now.

Just about 80 pounds less of Justin, less of me.  My character still unchanged and persona happier than ever, just less excess.  Less eating and more living, less sitting and more doing, and less exhaustion and more energy.  Now exhibiting a healthier lifestyle allows me to branch out from my minds barriers, escaping from the norms towards something new, something better.  I never let weight define me physically, outwardly, or personally; but my physical loss releases the inner curiosity that propels me to an alternate route on the fast-paced highway of life.

Eating Kittens at 8pm

The Gators will prevail, like always… Watch out LSU

Tonight, starting at 8pm, something will happen.  It won’t be shocking, it won’t be unpredicted, and it won’t go unnoticed!  University of Florida Gators, with or without Tebow, will kill those little purple kittens, we will command death valley, and end all of LSU’s hope.  I do not want to appear harsh or cold, but when you play with the big boys, you will get roughed up like the big boys… Those who are laughing in disbelief, the “I told you so” will happen around 11:30pm.

Give Them a Break!

Sometimes People Deserve a Break From the Cards They Were Dealt

Omi, the family chosen, german originating word for grandmother

“I know what i got now, after cornea transplants, who knows what I’m going to have”

Born in Germany in an extreme rural countryside, hard work and “slave-like” treatment was no stranger to her, mentally nor physically.  At age six she lugged up bags doubling her weight in a nearby castle for the royal travelers, by the time she could walk farm work became her hobby, and schooling was considered a luxury.  Her move to America further tested her individuality and capabilities more than the harsh establishments in the “Old Country.”  She escaped the wrath of her overbearing uncle from the help of a man named Christian; Christian Harlacher, my grandfather.  Presently, steadfast in the aging process, she suffers from multiple diseases caused by negligent doctors after myriads of surgical procedures.  Recent contraction of MRSA, from a hip replacement, kept her hospital ridden for weeks.  Multiple eye diseases cripple her vision to seeing nothing but unrecognizable remnants of faces.  Today this 80 year old couple traveled 4 hours by car to south Florida’s pristine eye institute, Bascam Palmer, who told her they could not help.  I’m a firm believer in karma and judging from her past, I motion for a get out of jail free card!

A newbie still learning the ropes :)

Continuing my concern for finding a suitable topic; but till then, some jargon.

Today, so far, is a continued display of the norm. Arose at 5:30 am, half-heartedly groped for clothes in the cave-like darkness, stammered in the shower, brushed my teeth and stared into the mirror. Do you ever take a moment and look at yourself, just stare at your reflection? Wonder what life has in store? where will you be 5 years from now? Yep, today was one of those days.

Waiting for the number 12, smothered by fellow students whose veiny eyes were propped open from the overbearing intoxication of caffeine. I could tell they were thinking the same thing i was… future. as the 40 degree air-conditioned bus ride came to completion and my dismount alluded to the condensation of my glasses I swiped my ID for the newspaper.

Fifteen minutes to spare before my East German Professor began his lecture of lower respiratory infections, I gobbled up information from the paper. President Barack Obama unknowingly won the nobel peace prize, and was illuminated with an awakening phone call at 6 am. toggling past the headlines i staggered across an announcement that the local student newsroom is seeking an opinions columnist and is hosting an open house this afternoon in search for their need.

“All majors welcome, Creative ideas needed, on the spot interviews”

Being a microbiology major and an empty writing portfolio holds me back for the time being. Having the creative idea isn’t the issue, but reactions to it from this blog may be the perfect test for social approval.

Hello to the blogging family!

Directed, over focused, non-spontaneous to life’s opportunities

Middle school was the birth place of my preordained destiny, this was where my life goal was established and all paths leading to this point mapped and routed before the breach of high school.  A, was the soul letter spanning my high school transcript perfectly aligned, adjacent to the surplus of science courses drowning out the occasional elective.  Raced to the finish clicking the submit button to all my college applications, hurtled through orientations, obliterated course placement tests, and finally walked into the University of Florida as a freshmen.  A freshmen, with 60 credits.

The step-by-step procedure outlined within my conscience paved a perfect path without detours, to this point in my life.  School, extracurricular activities, volunteer work, and physician shadowing encompassed my time leaving only scraps to allow for curiosity.

University classes came and went, while my library tab rapidly inclined to a near vertical angle.  pre-med organizations, honors fraternity, teacher assistant, and volunteer hours emulated my life.  Now, it’s my senior year! I am 20 years old, and i want to make a change.  My passion for writing and helping the community has broken the barrier within my heart and has saturated my brain, I NEED to fulfill and embrace this aspect of my personality.

My constant wrangle to keep me on my preordained track has loosened.  My biggest desire is to be a doctor, but my youth and sheer curiosity won’t allow for rocks to go unturned.  I must experience writing, I must do teach for america.  After I have made my mark, my continued expression will be strengthened by only two letters; MD.

Next year is my year to branch out from my minds grasp, to go after the unknown and experience the unexperienced.  To my fellow bloggers, I will take you through this journey, for those who cannot branch out from their routines and responsibility live it through me.  I am still undecided of who or what my blog will focus, but i will incorporate this aspect of the NEW ME into which ever topic i choose.

spontaneity is a power that only courage can produce.  I am taking the risk and detouring off my path.  Where will I end up?

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